wait 'til next year

when i was a teenager, i always found it incredibly difficult to achieve success. meanwhile, time and time again my best friend, a.s., seemed to stumble upon success without even breaking a sweat. i recall the time we both applied for a waitering gig at the brand new olive garden near yonge and eg. i spent hours and hours preparing for my interview - my wardrobe, my resume, my answers, the whole works. a.s., on the other hand, was merely tagging along for the ride. he didn't dress up, he didn't bring a cv, and he certainly didn't rehearse his answers for days on end like i had. but in the end, he got the job, while i didn't. and damn if he wasn't the worst bloody waiter i had ever seen. but he still got the call. and i didn't.

now i distinctly recall asking myself at the time, where is the justice in that? after all, i had worked my ass off to ensure that i would place myself near the top of the hiring chain. a.s. hadn't even bothered to put on a tie that morning. in fact, as far as i can recall, he was sporting a beaver canoe cable knit sweater during his interview, the one that everyone in our hood was sporting at the time. who knows? maybe the manager of the olive garden liked his sweater or something. but i digress.

what is it about failure that makes some folks feel like the world has come to an end? maybe they haven't experienced failure often enough to understand how to deal with it. maybe they haven't experienced success often enough to place failure in its proper context.

because after 42 years of winning and losing, the one question i ask about failure is never, why failure? no, for me the question at this stage of my existence is rather, when is failure next?

the other day i received an email from a kid in one of my clubs. she had just suffered through what must have seemed to her one of the most miserable days in her young life. earlier in the day i had not-so-politely dressed her down for falling short on a task i had assigned her. later that same day she failed to win an executive position after several elections in another one of my clubs. in short, the day had not gone very well for her. quite frankly, given how her afternoon had unfolded, she had every reason to simply crawl on home and sulk. to feel sorry for herself. to give up. but instead, later that evening, i received the aforementioned email from her containing a half-dozen solid suggestions as to how best to right the ship that had somehow gone astray. an email in which she proved to both me and herself that she was not a quitter. and i must admit that i was almost moved to tears by the spirit and determination demonstrated in her letter.

not unlike the perseverance and fortitude shown by my ballteam after our heartbreaking loss on the final play of the championship match in 2009. once again, nobody would have batted an eye had we simply gone through the motions the following season. but instead we put together another solid year in 2010, going undefeated until we suffered yet another heartbreaking loss on the final play of the championship match this past season.

and so, as i am writing this, you may be asking yourself, why failure? why me? why now? and i suppose my only response to your query would be the following: because it was your turn to fail. just as it will be my turn to fail again soon. for as long as you continue striving for success, you will inevitably come up short at least some of the time.

why, even the greatest baseball players on the planet fail seven out of every ten times they step up to the plate. and speaking of the great american pastime, today's magnificent weather has reminded me of one more thing: tryouts for my ballteam lie less than six months away. and who knows? this may finally be our year.

"never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat." - f. scott fitzgerald

who the hell is working the soundboard?