la-la-la-latrine

yorkdale was surprisingly quiet this afternoon. but that still didn't make my trip to the family washroom near shoppers drug mart any easier. seven had to use the facilities. she's too old now to accompany me to the men's room. but, in my highly overprotective opinion, she's still too young to visit the ladies' room on her own. something about kidnappers or creepers or falling into the bowl. so the family washroom is the perfect compromise. when seven was younger and barely out of diapers, the decision as to which public lavatory to use was simpler. where no family restroom was available, she and i were forced to pay a visit to the urinal chamber. of course, difficulties inevitably arose. for one, she's a girl, so standing up was never an option. but making contact with a yellow-soaked toilet seat was also out of the question. over time i mastered the art of holding seven just inches above the bowl with one arm tucked under her knees while the other arm supported her weight behind her back. this usually resulted in most of her business ending up inside the porcelain, although every now and then an occasional misfire would necessitate a vigorous scrubbing of my hands and arms under a warm tap for a few hours. later i would perfect my patented technique of laying bathroom tissue across the seat. front. side. back. side. and repeat. and repeat again. and again. by the time i was done unfurling the roll, the split plastic seat looked more like a cushion. so that brings me back to yorkdale and our father and daughter outing to the family restroom. seven is strong enough and agile enough now to hover over the bowl by herself in a crouched position without actually making contact with the seat. frankly the kid is a pro. i guess i'm proud of her. not quite first steps proud or valedictorian proud, but proud nonetheless.

"when you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced. live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice." - cherokee proverb

speaking of bathroom humour, this is almost as funny as the original: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOWK7Tam01M