knees up, part deux

so i was stopped at a red light on bathurst this afternoon, on my way home from the office so to speak, when i noticed this middle-aged woman jogging on the spot. she was decked out in coal grey lululemon tights, matching windbreaker, matching wool cap, and compulsory ipod. i reckon she was waiting for the light to turn green so that she could scoot off on her merry way. anyhow, as i sat there in my coal grey honda waiting for the light to turn green myself, i couldn't help but think how odd she appeared - just chugging away there on her mark even though there was nowhere she could actually venture at the time. yeah, yeah, spare me your angry missives. i know that somewhere in the urban jogger's manifesto it is written that in order to maintain an elevated heart rate and muscle memory one must do just as the middle-aged marathoner was doing this afternoon. but really... on bathurst street? in the middle of the day? and at a busy intersection no less? really? c'mon. i mean, if you're so intent on maintaining an elevated heart rate and muscle memory that you're willing to subject yourself to multiple thirty-second intervals of running-on-the-spot at local stoplights, then why bother leaving home in the first place? i mean, why not just pick up a second-hand treadmill or stairmaster or elliptical on craigslist and make do in the relative peace and tranquility of your rec room? i mean, hell, why even go so far as to make that home gym purchase to begin with? why not simply throw on some sweat pants and a pair of old sneakers and begin jogging on the spot after you drag your ass out of bed tomorrow morning? just look at the upside. no din. no smog. no mutts. no pedestrians. no sidewalk cracks. and best of all, no traffic lights.

"i don't get it. you exit your front door, you circle the block a few times, and then you end up right back where you started. why bother leaving home in the first place?" - anonymous