so are you a dog person or a cat person? because your answer says more about the type of person that you are than it does about the type of pet that you prefer. here's the 411 on canines. simply put, dogs are the slaves of the animal kingdom. and if you prefer dogs to cats, then you, my dear, are a slave master. how so? it's like this. dogs are ridiculously obedient. you tell them to roll over, they roll over. you tell them to fetch a stick, they fetch a stick. sit up. sit up. bark. bark. and why are dogs so accommodating? well, it's not because they actually like you. that's hardly the reason. no, instead, it's because you've got the one thing they're desperately looking for: lunch. promise a dog a juicy bone and he'll climb the himalayas for you. promise a dog a plateful of kibble and she'll cross the sahara for you. no food, no love. it's that simple. now cats, on the other hand, cats are a different breed altogether. cats are more like... more like... more like people. you have to earn their respect. you have to work for the admiration of our feline friends. tell a cat to roll over, and he'll tell you to take a hike. tell a cat to fetch a stick, and she'll tell you where you can put that stick. sit up. why? meow. you meow, asshole. cats have their own lives, and they're not easily distracted from their busy schedules. 9 am: late wake up. 10 am: morning nap. 12 noon: contemplate the existential nature of mankind. 1 pm: late lunch. 3 pm: stretch and exercise. 3:05 pm: afternoon nap. 5 pm: stare at owner. 7 pm: late supper. 8 pm: lie on warm tv and stare at owner some more. 10 pm: call it a day. so there you have it... a day in the life of a kitty cat. which means if you're looking to fill the void in their lives, you'd better have something special planned and it'd better be fun. otherwise, mr jinx may be "busy" that afternoon.
"eventually we all get our wings" - anonymous
once he was addicted to jane: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpkmtweNQ-U
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this is irrelevant, but i came to your blog thinking you'd actually quote philip on those seven words that he repeated to you today in class. why? well. i wanted to do the same, but i don't remember what he said. i'm a bit disappointed sir. on another note, harhar, you wrote this an hour ago.
ReplyDeleteIf you enjoy having friends that ignore you and never give a damn about what you say, then yeah, I bet you're a cat person. We domesticated leopards and tigers into little spiteful balls of fur, and despite how much care you give it, it'll never return any of it.
ReplyDeleteThe first people to domesticate wolves into dogs were smart, because dogs are naturally similar to humans. Instead of hunting solo like a leopard would, wolves hunt in packs. When two species hunt together, both relying on each other for support, it's a mutual symbiotic relationship.
There are a lot more stories of crazy cat ladies than crazy dog ladies. One species will drive you nuts more efficiently.
I like Richard comments. I meant to comment on this post after reading it but I guess Richard has said everything I had in mind.
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