little spiteful balls of fur

ok, i must admit that "little spiteful balls of fur" is funny. in fact, i'm willing to publicly concede that rs is probably the funniest vegetarian i know. that said, his comments are still laced with countless factual errors requiring a hasty rebuttal. to wit:

one, i have owned both cats and dogs in my lifetime. and the cats i have owned were most certainly capable of reciprocating my love (although i'm not really sure why i want to confess to that in the first place.) it did take months, however, before i was finally able to persuade ms kitty that i was worthy of her loyalty and respect. kinda like a human being, rs. on the other hand, the dogs i have kept typically expressed their unconditional allegiance to me within fifteen minutes or so of returning home from the pet store. and right about the time that i grabbed a can opener and shouted "lunch." if that's what you call love, rover, then you can keep your hollow devotion.

two, as far as oddball pet owners are concerned, yes, i admit that over the years i have undoubtedly heard my fair share of "crazy cat lady" stories. but from a purely anecdotal point of view, i can certainly attest to the fact that my condo is absolutely crawling with shining examples of "crazy dog lady" stories, as well. take the wingnut on the 11th floor who talks to her bichon frise more than she talks to her neighbours. and when i say talk, i mean talk, baby. politics... current events... mortgage rates... you name it, she's chatted up fido about it. then there's the nutbar in the penthouse who likes to dress her pomeranian in the latest fashions before taking her out for a walk. i'm talking cardigan sweater, spotted short shorts and leather booties. if this lady is playing with a full deck, then deal me out.

three, i'm not really interested in the mutually symbiotic nature of man's ties to domesticated wolves, rs. 'cause the last time i checked, one of these species was still pack hunting for venison in the wild while the other was shopping solo for t-bones at metro.

and finally, when future generations of anthropologists look back on north american domestic life in the 21st century, they will undoubtedly be puzzled by the peculiar relationship between man and his so-called best friend. after all, my bff doesn't follow me around with a plastic bag on the off chance that i may have to perform nature's duties. who's crazy now, rs?

p.p.s. your defiance is just as pronounced en francais... kid.