about a year or so ago, i attended a very intriguing conference at a nearby high school (on a pd day, no less) on the topic of youth and new media. it was actually a one-man seminar presented by a well-known canadian media pundit (whose name escapes me now) attempting to provide practical advice to educators (fancy word for teachers) on how to better understand young people in the face of emerging communication and entertainment technologies. the crux of the speaker's message was this: today's kids have exploited modern technologies to the point where they now view the world through an entirely different prism than the one used by previous generations. blah, blah, blah. alright, so i wasn't exactly buyin' everything this sharpie was sellin', but at least one point advanced during the afternoon session certainly stood out in my mind. the point was this: modern youth have a wholly unique take on friendship and intimacy compared to the societal norms that my peer group grew up with. more specifically, generation y primarily views friendship as a collective experience to be shared by the larger social group one belongs to, whereas those of my era perceived friendship as something to be cherished between two (and only two) individuals. nowhere is this distinction between the ages better highlighted than in an examination of generational film cultures. the contemporary motion picture example cited by the speaker in support of his thesis was the iconic high school musical franchise. you know... troy, gabriella, sharpay and the rest of the triple threat gang from creatively-titled east high. it is interesting, the speaker noted, how each of the installments in the hsm chain concludes with the entire gang huddled together in song and dance, whether it be in a school gymnasium, a country club swimming pool or at an outdoor graduation ceremony. compare those finales with the seminal youth films of my adolescence - specifically those of director john hughes and his molly ringwald trilogy (sixteen candles, breakfast club and pretty in pink). by the close of each of those celluloid classics, molly ringwald's character had succeeded in isolating the boy of her dreams, be it on top of a dining table, inside a high school detention hall or outside of her senior prom. but more significantly, the message of the filmmaker responsible for these 80's exemplars was clear: friendship and intimacy can only be truly enjoyed alongside one other person. the moral behind the hsm trilogy, on the other hand, moves in an entirely different direction: in those films, friendship and intimacy can only be achieved via the pursuit of multiple, simultaneous relationships with as many persons as possible. and given the predominance of hsm culture in schools today, perhaps that explains why i am always so surprised to observe two best friends at my place of work behaving like two best friends used to behave in my day: namely, spending almost all of one's free time with one another to the exclusion of all others. that type of relationship just doesn't seem to exist anymore amongst the younger set. even my seven-year-old daughter has fallen prey to modern norms and conventions surrounding companionship. just ask her who her "best friend" is these days and you will likely hear seven different names on seven different days. i, on the other hand, can name each and every one of my best friends growing up, and in chronological order i might add, from the time i entered kindergarten until the present day: to wit, m.a. followed by j.m. followed by a.s followed by m.w. followed by a few unfortunate others. a proud accomplishment, i would argue, and one that characterizes both the time and the place i came of age in.
"truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget." - unknown
the epitome of friendship: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q92koTpH6Gg&feature=related and this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QMeU1XO9RUc and this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AE1CwsNw7yY but not this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9FN89jWaw8s&feature=related
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