blow it out your ear

so my kid told me that i stunk of cigarette smoke when i walked through the door this evening. "you stink." uh... we were playing baseball in the rain. "no, you stink of cigarette smoke." cigarette smoke? are you sure? "yeah, i'm sure. you don't smoke now, do you, dad?" no, i don't smoke now, for christ's sake. do you really think i would start smoking at 41? on a wednesday? in the middle of the afternoon? "then why do you stink of cigarette smoke?" uh... i dunno. unless... unless it was the cigarette smoke coming from the car in front of me on spadina. i was waiting for the light at spadina and eglinton again. i could smell the smoke coming through the vents. it was really strong. i certainly noticed it at the time. i was stuck behind that car for what seemed like an eternity. the driver was hanging her still-smouldering ciggy out the window. i remember swearing at her to put her g-ddam hand back inside her g-ddam window. but she didn't hear me. i think my windows were up. truth be told, i cannot stand smokers. seriously, they really, really annoy me. for one, smokers are stupid. damn stupid. if i asked you to set alight more than 4000 chemicals and then proceed to ingest the residue into your lungs, you would probably tell me to take a hike. but smokers do this every day of their lives. and they even pay for the privilege of doing so. for another, smokers are rude. damn rude. smokers knowingly and willingly foul the air that the rest of us are forced to breathe in. second-hand smoke is known to cause cancer. second-hand smoke is known to contain carbon monoxide and other poisons. second-hand smoke causes irritation of the eyes, nose and throat. second-hand smoke causes headaches, coughing and dizziness. second-hand smoke is especially dangerous to children, pregnant women and the elderly. and yet, smokers continue to puff away without even a hint of concern for the health or safety of their fellow man. that is just plain rude. and for another, smokers are liars. damn liars. take the mean old lady across the hallway who's been bothering my family with her cigarette smoke for almost two years now. in the beginning, she denied that she was a smoker. then she told us that she had quit. then she claimed that she only smoked on her balcony. then she said that she was on the "patch." lies, lies, lies. grandma smokes just as much today as she did when she first arrived on the floor. hey, as a libertarian i don't really mind if someone engages in self-destructive behaviour, just as long as they do so within the closed confines of their own personal space. but when someone's self-destructive behaviour begins to interfere with the satisfaction and enjoyment of my life, that's where i draw the line. look, you wanna kill yourself with nasty carcinogens and toxic chemicals, be my guest. just don't blow your filthy poison into my face, capiche? haven't you looked in the mirror lately, smoker? you stink. your clothes stink. your teeth are yellow. your fingers are yellow. you don't look cool. you don't look mature. you don't impress anyone with your technique. you're weak. you're pathetic. you are a nuisance.

now that is judgmental.

"one thousand americans stop smoking every day... by dying." - unknown

step off, man... just step off: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-CDzDpSdzY