a day in the er

an afternoon in the er allows one an opportunity to reflect on some of the finer points of ontario's health care system:

• as catholicism is to the vatican, "proper hand hygiene" is to the er
• hospital gowns should come with instructions
• just because your doctor graduated from medical school doesn't mean that he graduated at the top of his class
• hospital gurneys were not designed by someone born to a mother and father standing 5'8" and 6'3" respectively
• moaning brings orderlies; crying brings nurses; screaming brings residents; threats of a lawsuit bring attending physicians
• bedpans are colder than they look
• insertion of iv needle... painful; insertion of blood work needle... more painful; removal of medical tape from hairy forearm holding iv needle in place... hell on earth
• hopping on a bus sporting a hospital bracelet and blood-soaked cotton ball typically permits the passenger a wide berth
• and finally... no one likes a smart ass in the er (sorry)

"life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon." - doug larson

'cause you never know: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qFIaI1M5kU